I want to extend special thanks to those who took the time to follow and read my blog this year. I enjoyed your visit. It feels good to know you were interested in what I had to say when I did say anything.
I am also sorry that my blogging pattern has fallen off recently. Life gets in the way and I often struggle with whether I should blog about my issues.
‘Who cares’ is the voice I battle with.
‘Why dump your bad days on your readers? Everyone has their own troubles, you don’t need to spew more onto them.’
That voice most often wins.
It’s a voice I’ll have to battle as the new year approaches. I either have to stay on the blogging horse or get off altogether. But I’d like to continue blogging, put my voice out there, even if it’s one of dissent or depression, or conversations with myself. It’s my rose gardens. It’s my thorns. It’s what I said I’d blog about, even when its a streak of thorns that seems to be all I can stumble through.
And maybe not everyone will ‘stay away’ if I share my personal failures. Maybe there are other people who can identify with my caged bird stories. Maybe I don’t need to listen to that discouraging voice that keeps asking, Who cares? Or maybe I should just ignore the Notifications and the site stats that I check way too often and just write what’s on my over-analytical, not so lucid brain. Feel the immobilising fear and write about it cause that’s what I feel and experience at this point.
Forget what my About page says and it’s promises and that I’m not sticking to the big picture and the goals and just write. Admit that I am a lazy, distracted blogger who reads too much about what other ‘successful’ bloggers say defines my success. Admit that I probably am never gonna make it big or have the same site stats that some bloggers have. Maybe I should just stop all the marketing and just write and who will come, come. Maybe I should stop thinking and just let my thoughts flow as they are doing now, not really going anywhere, just saying, y’know.
Put my good, my bad, my sense and my nonsense until my change comes… a new vibe, the ‘what’ I’m aiming to become.
Whole, lucid, prolific.
Maybe I should just ‘say’ and forget the rest. Who will come, will come. Or maybe I should change my focus to reflect the dynamic patterns of my life. Probably that’s what I should do. Not try to be a magazine, just be a blog. Be the little train car and not the whole train. At least for now, until my change comes.
For now and today, all I have are fragments and a hoarse discordant song.
You can listen in or not. Tomorrow gifts a new day.
When I MAY HAVE A NEW SONG, a more perfect one.
Thanks for keeping me company in my rose garden this year.
I was truly blessed to be read by the universe. When I am asked again, Who cares?
I’ll stick my chin up and proudly say
My 72 followers and 1,300 visitors who just viewed and stopped to chat or just silently cheered from the side-lines.
Thank you, yes you.
Have a fantastic 2015!